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Surefire Ways to Make Your Second Shaadi More Successful
While many couples see remarriage as a second shot at happiness, the statistics tell a different story. According to available Population data, the divorce rate for second marriages in the United States is over 60% compared to around 50% for first marriages.
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Surefire Ways to Make Your Second Shaadi More Successful
When you start to feel like your marriage has become toxic or you’re just incapable of building a happy life with your partner, it’s okay to end the marriage. Your soulmate could be still out there in the world, waiting for you. Just because your first marriage didn’t work out, it doesn’t mean you can’t fall in love or marry once again.
Of course, when you enter a second marriage, you’re more experienced, mature, and willing to work on your deficiencies. With some effort, you can have a successful remarriage that last forever. What can you do to get there? Here are some things that definitely help.
-) Avoid Comparisons with Your Previous Marriage
The worst thing you can do in a second marriage is to compare it with the first. Know that you’re married to another person and accept that everything will be different. Comparisons will only take away your peace of mind and will not allow you to settle down with your new partner.
-) Discuss Expectations Early On
When you’re seeking a partner for second marriage marriage, it’s best to discuss your expectations with them early on and learn about theirs. If you or your prospective partner already has children from the first marriage, you should also discuss how you’ll raise them. Be honest, direct, and clear right from the start to avoid misunderstandings.
-) Appreciate Your Partner
Never miss an occasion to appreciate your partner and let them know what they mean to you. Small words and gestures of appreciation can go a long way towards letting your partner know that you’re happy and satisfied with your second marriage, and it’ll make them more secure around you.
-) Be on the Same Team as Your Partner
You and your partner must always be on the same team. There may be times when other family members may disagree with you on something, and in those times, you should make it a point to let your partner know that you’re in their corner and vice versa!
-) Give Your Partner Time to Adjust
You or your partner may require some time to adjust to the new life when you first start out. As a rule of thumb, you should give your partner all the time they have to get used to the changes and do all you can to make them feel comfortable. If you need time to accommodate, you should also communicate the same to your partner.
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Here are 10 More Rules for Successful Second MarriagesWith numerous first and second marriages ending in divorce, it’s time to explore the top 10 rules on how to make a marriage work the second time around:
The first step is to envision yourself in an open and honest relationship. Don’t let rejection, failure, or past hurt keep you from experiencing the love and intimacy you are destined to receive.
- Gradual Open-UpExperiment with being vulnerable in small steps to gain confidence in being more open with your partner. These could slowly deepen your relationship. Discussing minor issues (such as schedules and meals) is an excellent place to start before tackling more important issues such as child discipline or finances.
- Stay Honest In a second marriage, honesty and communication are crucial. Be forthcoming about finances, your past, and any pertinent concerns with your former spouse and children.
- Practice ForgivenessForgivingness does not imply condoning the harm done to you, but it does allow you to move on. Remember that you are all on the same team and learn to pardon others.
- Spend time with your partner Take time away from your children to do things you enjoy as a couple. A “date night” or couples time can be very enriching — even if it’s just going for a walk or getting a yummy sandwich at a restaurant.
- Stay RespectfulRespectfully express your thoughts, feelings, and wishes. When couples sweep things under the rug, resentment can build, so be vulnerable and don’t bury negative emotions.
- Clear the Air Discussion sensitive issues privately, such as money and personality conflicts, but hold regular, informal family meetings (where everyone feels heard) to clear the air and address family issues.
- Embrace Differences Don’t let parenting differences separate you. The stepparent’s role is that of a friend and supporter rather than a disciplining. Learn new techniques and share your ideas. When the remarriage marriage offers you a chance to find love again, never let these differences overpower you.
- Building UnderstandingProblems are never over; Instead, start accepting that ups and downs are inevitable. Keep making consistent efforts to be more understanding with each other — as well as with your children and stepchildren.
- Change your Personality If your personality wasn’t a bright one in your first marriage, try changing it a bit! Make a commitment to working on your stamina and patience. Many of the kinks that come with step family life will smooth out over time.
- Stay Grateful Gratitude can make things work out even if they are on edge. Pay gratitude to your partner for being there for you, every moment when you couldn’t make it to the top.